May 13, 2011

Jobs-san,

Your iPad has become a tool for my animators (ironic that something I resisted now preserves our traditions). Hand-drawn animation contains humanity—imperfections that breathe life. Your devices capture this spirit.

AI animation troubles me deeply. Can algorithms understand why a lonely child gazing at clouds matters? Mathematics cannot capture a leaf’s trembling.

— Hayao Miyazaki
Animation and Technology
May 15, 2008

Dear Michael,

It’s-a me, Mario! Your moonwalk reminds me of sliding on ice blocks in World 6! I bounce on Goombas; you glide across stage—same energy! Your dancing defies gravity like my jumps.

I sent you some 1-UP mushrooms with this letter—they give extra lives! Maybe they can help with your… health issues? We should collaborate on a music-platformer game!

— Mario
Moonwalking and Pipe-Jumping
June 15, 1992

Mr. Manson,

“Heal the World” isn’t about apocalyptic cleansing; it’s about unity. “Thriller” contains no coded instructions, just dancing zombies. Your interpretation of my falsetto as commands is concerning.

Please stop sending drawings of me with apocalyptic imagery. My team finds them disturbing. There are no hidden messages in my music. None.

— Michael Jackson
The Man in the Mirror
December 2, 1983

Hey Michael,

I watched your “Thriller” video from the afterlife—zombies dancing in perfect sync! If only I could have painted movement like you dance it. You’ve mastered what I attempted in art.

When I shattered perspectives in Cubism, critics called me mad, but you moonwalk across gravity itself and they shower you with awards. Keep breaking rules—true art shatters what came before.

— Pablo Picasso
On the Nature of Creativity
August 20, 1969

Charles,

“Helter Skelter” is about a PLAYGROUND SLIDE, not the apocalypse. I never said “start a race war”—I specifically said “love your neighbors” and “blessed are the peacemakers.”

The Beatles were making music, not sending secret messages. Forehead carvings are NOT in the Bible anywhere. Please stop using my name for violence. It contradicts everything I taught.

— Jesus Christ
A Serious Misunderstanding
May 15, 1912

Jesus,

Your crucifixion has been painted thousands of times—the perfect symbol of suffering and transcendence. Artists keep returning to it, finding new dimensions in this singular moment.

When I painted faces from multiple angles, I was merely attempting what you achieved naturally—being both divine and human simultaneously.

— Pablo Picasso
The Art of Divinity